Neighbours, don't get me started on this one. I can talk for England about this subject but I'll keep it short. Ahem!
Bad neighbours are the bane of my life. They drive me nuts, they bring out things in me I didn't know existed. There were times when I contemplated doing prison time rather than live next door to them. Thankfully, the authorities got there before I did.
I've lived next door to a few bad apples in my day and mark my words, they almost put me in the pysch ward at the nut house. The constant thumping of the bass music which was played as if they were deaf. Banging late at night which made me want to kick their front door off it's hinges.
Bad neighbours are the bane of my life. They drive me nuts, they bring out things in me I didn't know existed. There were times when I contemplated doing prison time rather than live next door to them. Thankfully, the authorities got there before I did.
I've lived next door to a few bad apples in my day and mark my words, they almost put me in the pysch ward at the nut house. The constant thumping of the bass music which was played as if they were deaf. Banging late at night which made me want to kick their front door off it's hinges.
I was forced to listen to in-depth relationship arguments every weekend after their boozy night out, always coupled with physical punch-ups, lengthy screams and the sound of smashing furniture. And it was me that had to get out of my warm bed to tell them to 'keep it down'. It was me that was verbally abused because I tried to reason with them and it was me that was left to call the police. My actions turned me into the bad guy. My good was being evil spoken of. Can anyone work that out?
Would I do it again? Hell yes. If you don't disturb me, then I won't disturb you. I don't even have the time to deal with the neighbours who spew out babies and allow them to run rampant destroying the communal areas, increasing my service charges. Try having a reasonable conversation with their parents, just bring your shield because it always ends bad. And how about the ones who don't pick up after their dogs have deposited their stools outside your door? I pay good money for my shoes.
Love your neighbour? Boy, that's a big ask on the best of days!
So my question is:
Have you ever had neighbours behaving badly? Please share your story with us.
Are you comfortable reporting your neighbours to the authorities when they behave badly?
Has a neighbour ever complained about your behaviour? - C'mon, be honest now!
I'd love to hear your views, comments and opinions.
I've been very lucky. Despite my numerous residences, I've never had what I'd call a bad neighbor. I even had two exceptional neighbors who became as close to me as parents.
ReplyDeleteBut I empathize. Rotten neighbors can make life miserable. It shouldn't have to be that way. Whatever happened to common courtesy?
You are indeed very fortunate Maria. I never did understand why some people have no thought as to how they affect everyone else. Thanks for your comment.
DeleteWow, you had a bunch of horrible experiences.
ReplyDeleteNo, nobody has ever complained about me because I respect my neighbors. When I lived with my parents we had bad experiences with neighbors, but I haven't had bad experiences lately.
Two years ago I had a wonderful family living next door. We helped each other a lot. But then they had to move because of job opportunities elsewhere. The new people who came to live next door were cold and aloof.
Now we live somewhere else but I haven't had the chance to socialize. I have been lazy to socialize with them and I'm always busy, so my neighbors are a mystery and we don't interact much. We respect each other, though. I live in a very quiet neighborhood.
Good luck with your neighbors.
Good post. I enjoyed it.
It's good to get to know your neighbours because when things go wrong it's much easier to communicate effectively with them. I know that you're busy but since it's the festive season, it's a great opportunity to give them a little cake or invite them for a glass of mulled wine to 'break the ice' so to speak. Thanks for stopping by Julia.
DeleteI too have been lucky
ReplyDeleteWe had a sex screamer next to us once....which was a bit embarrassing
After 30 minutes of " I'm coming" yelled at the top of their lungs
I remember banging on the wall yelling
" for fucks sake come for him"
Oops, careful John careful (I mean with your language).
DeleteThat must have been a real embarrassing moment for all parties. Thanks mate.
We did have an experience just like yours with neighbours from hell. It just about drove us crazy. It was the constant, night and day, loud booming music that drove us round the bend. The police did nothing as the neighbours turned down the volume when the cops showed up and turned it right back up after they left. They were also drug dealers - but that was silent). Eventually we decided to move, even if we liked the house very much. However, just as we started looking for a new place, they left! However I would say that the experience left us 'psychologically fragile' in that, all these years later, we still cannot stand any booming music.
ReplyDeleteOne of the guys was an ex-convict and once I was so mad at him (I was weeding by the sidewalk and, as he walked by, he spat on me) that I actually frighten him. I was past the point of being afraid. He instinctively realized it and quickly backed off, actually he ran indoor.
After they left it was fine and where we now live, the closest neighbours are quiet and at least 1000 feet away (guess why we selected a place so far from neighbours)
I totally emphasize with you Alain. It's a horrible feeling when you're afraid of what someone else might say or do to you, especially if you think the person is on drugs etc, because they can be very unpredictable. It beggars belief to think that one human being would just spit on you just like that. It's disgusting in fact, and I'm sorry for what they done to you.
DeleteBut, I had to laugh when you said you had past the 'point of being afraid' because that's when people don't realise just how dangerous a man can get. This is the point where it's a case of no return and you don't care about the consequences. I'm not surprised he ran indoors, ha ha ha.
Now I know why you're in such a beautiful and quiet place now, as I can see from your blog.
Not too many problems. One older lady stopped me whenever she saw me to speak for hours about her genius grandson. Three seconds was all it took to drag him into the conversation. In ten years that grandson never visited her.
ReplyDeleteThat's sad. She must have loved him very much and what you have shown is the flip-side of neighbours - how they can be a force for good in the community. You taking the time to hear her out must have meant something to her. Thanks for taking the time to comment Stephen.
DeleteIt's a good thing the psycho was on a bike. Btw, any missing people in the neighborhood lately? My husband and I lived beneath a guy who liked to walk around in boots on wood floors at 3 a.m. He walked around a lot and never wore sneakers.
ReplyDeleteThis psycho was something else. I'd spy out the immediate area minutes before I took the rubbish out every few days, just in case he appeared in the bin sheds and I couldn't get away. It's funny now but was scary at the time.
DeleteI think your 'late night walker' was dressing up and parading himself around. It does happen :) But how inconsiderate!
Bear with me. I should add that up until recently, the nightmare of bad neighbours returned. They have now been sorted out. In fact, I confronted the latest batch of bullies and they backed down. We have peace restored. You have my total empathy.
ReplyDeleteI tried to copy and paste a post from the past about my a previous hellish situation with neighbours. Unfortunately it was too long to fit in the comments section.
If you want, here's the link,
http://klahanie.blogspot.co.uk/2007/05/not-so-neighbourly.html
Gary, I've just read your post about the troubles you had in the past with your neighbours. And what a story that was. You went through so much for so long and fought all the way. Thankfully, if paid off at the end but what a fight. I'm so glad you shared it with us. I've put a direct link below so everyone can have a read of it:
DeleteNot So Neighbourly by Gary
Our closest neighbors are coyotes, javelinas, and rattlesnakes. None of them qualify for the good neighbor award, but I leave them in peace if they keep their distance.
ReplyDeleteThanks Shelly but... errr... I think I'd rather have the noisy, fighting, spitting drug dealers though...ha, ha ha ha.
DeleteI've had a few neighbors from hell, including the one I have now. It's awful because they really drive you past where you want to go.
ReplyDeleteMy neighbor trained his dog to poop on our lawn instead of his. He was furious when we finally told him we'd call Animal Control. He came over screaming that my kids' basketballs sometimes bounce onto his lawn. I told him that if my kids ever poop on his lawn then he'd have a complaint, until then he needs to keep his dog at his house.
People are nuts. Luckily he's the only one in this neighborhood like that.
I was about to say, you should pick up the poop and fling it back onto his lawn, but I don't want to encourage bad behaviour.
DeleteIt takes one kind of a crazy brain to get to the conclusion that a kids basket ball on their lawn justifies pooping on your lawn. That's crazy. Thanks Karen.
Poor you:) those kind og neighbors are really irritating. Yes, I have seen those dog owner who does not pick up popo after their dog. Really irritating.
ReplyDeleteBut here in my neighborhood is really quiet. I have been nice lately:) just joking.
'Nice lately', you said.... C'mon spill the beans Joy.
DeleteGosh Rum, you seem to have had some horrendous neighbours. By contrast, I'm happy to leave the keys to my house in the UK with my nextdoor neighbours, who keep an eye on it while I'm in Hong Kong.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I do have some noisy neighbours in Hong Kong. If you don't believe me, check out what happened one Sunday afternoon.
Thanks for the link Dennis. Another insight into the exotic life you lead. You must admit, though, that your special Sunday afternoon was a lot more interesting than a load of bad rock music blaring out, followed by anti-social behaviour.
DeleteI can put up with the occasional one-off party so long as it isn't a daily or weekly affair.
I am sorry to hear about your nasty experiences, it must be very unpleasant. I think I have been very lucky in that respect, the neighbours I have had over the years have all been nice and can't say I have had any real problems although I have heard some stories from others so can sympathise.
ReplyDeleteWishing you a peaceful weekend.
I genuinely believe you can only really appreciate the value of good neighbours or even peace and quiet, when you have suffered these things being taken away from you. You're very fortunate to have dodged the rebels, mate. Thanks Suzanne.
DeleteI have had a few of those neighbors, I have called on a couple of them if I thought there was danger or the music was on way too loud, late at night.
ReplyDeleteIt's not always easy to get along with our neighbors, especially when we are so different. I do think there should be a respect level where we don't invade each others spaces. I know it is not always easy but we all need to make that effort for each other...
That's right Launna. You're not always going to hit it off with everyone and with the random nature of the neighbour relationship, there's no guarantee that you'll end up next to someone who is your 'cup of tea', but basic respect should at least tell people not to step on one another's toes!
DeleteI spent most of my youth in a Midwestern town, where 90% of the residents lived in homes not apartments. Now I live in Egypt, where it's the opposite. The culture is different and bad neighbor behavior is the norm. It's not considered polite to knock on the door of a man's home. Even if it's utilities men, they knock and then back off about five meters so as to seem respectful. People here to pick up others will lay on the horn repeatedly or simply yell from the street. At all hours. No one complains. It's standard here. It's a male dominated society, and the men easily take offense at any perceived criticism and are ready to yell or fight. It's like a country full of roosters. But very few psychos. We have a lot more of them in the west. I enjoyed your post! :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for this fresh perspective. I didn't think of the cultural differences Lexa, so thanks for putting that in the mix and it's quite important because what someone would class as normal behaviour, is deemed as bad manners to another. Thanks for taking the time to read and comment here.
DeleteI've had some crazy neighbors in my life, for sure. Most of them were women, horrible women. I could go on and on about one, from the assault charges we laid against her, to feeling so sorry for her children we contemplated calling the government on them, to cheering when her husband finally cheated on her (and then feeling defeated when he went back).
ReplyDeleteSeems like you've also had your fair of the nightmare neighbours too Dan. It really does put a strain on your emotions at times. Thanks for commenting.
DeleteThis is a funny (not ha ha, but strange) thing in the world.
ReplyDeleteIt has nothing to do with the brainless zombies we find around us, and we call human beings, but it is the logical development of lack of education, sad cultural environment, and migration, between other things, such as the easiness to ape the loose customs of non civilised (if this means anything) people.
We have here the funny (again, strange, not ha ha) balance between those who accept to live by a stern discipline, and those who decided (to be fair I should say it was decided for them) to open the gates and forget all things a yard away from their persons.
The particular point here is that this thing is relatively new and it is endemic to Earth, especially to populated concentration as cities, mega-cities, and their relative smaller conglomerate cohabitational groups, which can be of any size and stage in life.
A good or bad neighbour is like a raffle, you can have the lucky number for any of them, the foul attitude is a pervasive evil that ooze into our life and sometimes takes anyone, even ourselves walking the lane that makes us wild and our world a wilderness.
This said, which is something we all knew, let's see your usual questions:
1) Have you ever had neighbours behaving badly? Please share your story with us.
Only a few times: In Zebbug people was too private (they are still, but it not possible to deny that changes are coming, slowly but inexorably), they were too private as to call for attention on themselves, so my childhood was surrounded by too much silence and secret.
College time gave me a taste of the turmoil in which student life is, and the utter lack of privacy which was a real problem for a guy so shy and not given to public exposure like me.
Then, America with their usual impudence taught me another way to expose oneself and the others, but I must recognise it was somewhat bearable since I was living in Skokie not New York.
Finally, the Corporation days were too hectic and out of the way of "normal" people, and my days as entrepreneur in my actual job put me in too many hotels where, if you find a "lemon", there is always the concierge to help wring it.
Are you comfortable reporting your neighbours to the authorities when they behave badly?
How can I be "comfortable" if I am saying I do not like to stick my neck out of the windows?
Has a neighbour ever complained about your behaviour? - C'mon, be honest now!
Yes, I was denounced for taking showers at unseemly hours, and because sometime, on valid hours of the day, there seems to be occult procedures in my hotel room, with voices talking in strange parlance, even an old lady swore she heard the Devil giving me commands. Oh, well!! Many pies make a party.
Maybe they were listening to Elf, and I didn't realise he was talking aloud. :)
Your comments always put a smile on my face Od. Specially the part about blaming Elf!
DeleteAlso your observation about the rise of big cities as contributing. It forces people close together like a village, but without the intimacy of a community of people who all know each other and hence accountability for bad behaviour. So in many cases you get the worst of both worlds, as many of the comments so far seem to confirm.
Luckily I have good neighbours now. Previously a neighbour used to leave her dog unsupervised in the garden and he made a hole through the fence into my garden and found his way out into the street. I kept blocking up the fence on my side but he still used to find a way through. Once the dog escaped and she couldn't find him. She blamed me despite me walking the streets to find him. He was found unharmed but she could not see that she was at fault for not securing her dog.
ReplyDeletePeople like that always want someone to blame for their mistakes. She should have been grateful that you not only tried to fix the fence a number of times but you took the trouble to still search for her dog. Most people wouldn't have cared.
DeleteI'm wondering if her dog is still alive, since you're not there to stop it getting out on the streets now. Thanks for stopping by Simone.
I read about your experience with neighbors and thought that it should never ever happened to you. I am sorry that you went through all this.
ReplyDeleteI had also some not good experiences with my neighbors who were having a wild party in the middle of the night next door. I usually try to go out and talk to my neighbors nicely. It's my first step of compromise. Most of the time it doesn't work. Or work only for a very short time. Then I use my second step of compromise I try to threaten them that I call to police. And if it doesn't work also I bring out my stereo and blast it at its full volume. It funny but at that time I feel that I joined the wild party. It helps but not always. And then if it doesn't work I call to police. And I can tell you that I don't like to do that. I would rather have an understanding conversation and compromise and very good outcome.
Oh, I had to laugh when you said you'd blast your music too. That's so funny, and it was a good thing that the neighbours didn't call the police for you instead, ha ha ha. I did a similar thing not too long ago with a neighour whose bedroom wall is against mine. We both have these fitted sliding cupboard doors and she was forever sliding hers so hard it would bang and make the whole wall shake. One day I lost it and banged mine as hard as I could about a dozen times. It sounded like the room was being carpet bombed! Funny enough, she never did it again.
DeleteYes, it's always good to try and talk first, but some people are just so ignorant and action can speak louder than words sometimes - just sometimes though. Thanks Kaya
I generally get along okay with my neighbours, but that's because I make sure the boundaries are set right from the beginning. I don't want to like in an episode of Friends, so I make it absolutely clear they're not welcome in my house.
ReplyDeleteHa, ha ha ha. That's laying down a real thick line that cannot be crossed. Only Kellie could come up with that one, ha ha ha.
DeleteI had one neighbor who would stand in the window BUTT ASS NAKED, showing the whole neighbourhood his wrinkled "farmer John" and beans...you couldn't avoid it because his house was in the middle of our block...as teenagers we would laugh but you never wanted to invite people over...lol
ReplyDeleteHa, ha ha ha ha 'farmer John and beans' ha ha ha. LA Green, I love that.
DeleteIt's all fun for the kids but he's so lucky he wasn't arrested for exposure, or maybe he should have been. Some people love to get off on things like that. Man, you gave me a laugh. At least you had the option to look the other way, which isn't so easy with the noise nuisances.
Sorry to hear this. I went through that when I used to live in an apartment building on the second floor. The neighbors from upstairs and downstairs made a lot of noise late at night. I was so glad when I moved out of there to my own home. Then that was over.
ReplyDeleteConstant loud noises disturbing your sleep over a period of time, can really take it's toll on your well-being. Glad you got out of that situation Susana.
DeleteI can only say that I very much understand your trouble with this one... Might add that I would've been quiet scared myself, having had your Mr. Psycho as my neighbor.
ReplyDeleteI have to say that mostly thanks to the police, I kept calling every week, pressure was put on the landlord to evict my upstairs neighbors, but there's still 'work' to be done in the street - like the droppings from the pet dogs you mention, amongst other things -.
It's behavioral. And my question then is 'what is "normal", and how to 'keep it' "normal" in a society. Because moving doesn't necessarily guarantee better neighbors....
You've made a great point Ziva. Because after the expense of moving to another location, you can still have the same problems or find yourself in a worse situation. It almost happened to me. I was moving into my new home during the evening and could clearly hear the neighbour's TV on, as if it was in the same room as me. I knocked doors and was told that the walls are real thin and everyone can hear everyone else, even when they flush the toilet.
DeleteThat was enough info for me. I removed my furniture and returned to my original address and refused to hand my old keys back to the landlord. I told him to keep the other place, I wasn't going anywhere. Thanks for taking the time to comment Ziva.
I grew up in a working class neighborhood in Brooklyn, so it was impossible to avoid noisy, obnoxious neighbors. We were all living practically on top of each other. Loud music, drunken, domestic brawls, kids fighting in the street, dogs barking all night. It all seemed normal. No one really expected peace and quiet. The rule was pretty much "Mind your own business." Every now and then you'd hear someone shouting out of their upstairs window to a neighbor below to turn down the music or shut the dog up, but nothing ever happened. No one ever called the police or tried to get anyone evicted. That's the environment I grew up in. No wonder I'm so in love now with peace and quiet. What a crazy way to live!
ReplyDeleteBrooklyn sounds like some parts of East London to me :) And it seems that you opted for the complete opposite as soon as you were able to. I'd love to have a nice cosy country house, with neighbours of course, but not too close for comfort. Thanks for the comment NP.
DeleteNeighbours like this can certainly be such a drain on us. I live in an apartment building and have a family who are constantly quarreling among themselves or their immediate neighbours. Sorry to hear that your neighbours are so bad too :(
ReplyDeleteOops...meant to ask if you are on FB/ Twitter to connect. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteWell, in the past few years, several of the neighbours have either moved out, got evicted or are in fear of losing their tenancies, so it's got a good vibe at the moment. Let's just hope it stays that way. But with the festive season looming, I guess it's going to be a loud Christmas and New Year.
DeleteOh, sorry Corinne, I'm not on FB or Twitter. The only site I'm part of at the moment is BlogCatalog. If you like meeting and discussing loads of topics with people then it's the place to be. Please take a look. It would be great to have you on board. See link below
BlogCatalog
Ah - just saw this, but in the meanwhile, I've already connected with you on Blog Catalog. I must get more active there.
DeleteThink I'm one of the few who have never had this problem.
ReplyDeleteI'm not surprised living where you do! They don't exactly 'ramp' out there. Any suggestion of misbehaviour in your ends could lead to some serious gunplay!
DeleteBetween 1988 and 1990 we lived on MLK Jr. Way behind the MacArthur BART station and our next door neighbors were a gang who called themselves the 38th Street Boys. During that 2 year period, we had 3 murders within 30 feet of our front door. My friend got so disgusted with the situation that she pulled some of them aside and taught them the correct way to fire a handgun. It reduced the number of unintended targets, and after that they were a lot nicer to us.
ReplyDelete-Doug in Oakland
Oh my giddy aunt! I couldn't deal with gang warfare outside my door. She must have been one hell of a feisty woman to deal with them in such a way that she wasn't then targeted herself. Good for her. She got her point across and a good nights sleep in the process.
DeleteNice to hear from you Doug, and welcome.
I could relate to this post. A few times, I have neighbours who behaved badly, not knowing others' right who stay at the same neighbourhood. Luckily, they come and go because they rent the house next door. :)
ReplyDeleteI guess renting is a good thing in situations like this because it's easier to move away. If the property was owned then they might have lasted a lot longer. Thanks Balqis.
DeleteAhh We've moved several times and I have encountered a few "unfriendly" neighbors.
ReplyDeleteI have yet to receive a complaint against us and I hope it stays that way! :)
What a pain, Vanillahousewife! Moving itself is so stressful already, without having to find you've touched down into a nightmare. Out of the frying pan, into the fire, so to speak.
DeleteNeighbors...we are forced to endure. I've had my share of bad ones, good ones, etc. I've learned to keep them at arms length. Getting too close=drama. But when you have loud, inconsiderate neighbors such as you've outlined, it's difficult to take that approach when they insert themselves into your life with rudeness! You were right to confront (nicely). Just feel sorry for him, clearly he is an unhappy person.
ReplyDeleteToo right Nimsy. When I first moved into that particular home some time ago, I felt something was not right with him, especially when I found him in my front room on the day I was moving in. He just invited himself in with the removal men. I had that gut feeling, which served me well in the long run. Good to hear from you.
DeleteI am the BEST neighbor ever. I pretend none of my neighbors exist and I don't bother them. And that is all I want in return.
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha. That's one way of keeping your distance mate. I would put a sign on my front door saying 'don't even think about it', ha ha ha. Thanks for the comment Ragemichelle.
DeleteYikes! Sounds like you've had some real doozies. My closest neighbour is 1/4 mile away, and they've been pretty much great. So for once I don't have a story!! :)
ReplyDeleteWow, now that's real far. Just don't run out of sugar or milk. It's one heck of a walk to ask your neighbours to borrow some. Always good to hear from you Melody.
DeleteHi Rum Punch! You seem to have hit a nerve here...so many can relate to this!
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I have called the police for loud parties in our apartment complex, but we didn't want them to know it was us. I also lived in an apartment next to an Air Force member. He was on base all week (phew!), but threw unbelievably loud parties on the weekends. Ugh.
I really like my sleep. Mess with that, and I am not happy. Oh! I also call hotel front desks if there are partiers on my floor! So hey, don't feel bad. Just stay away from Mr. Psycho. Seriously. He sounds like a pack of trouble.
Thanks for your visit :)
Ceil
Ceil, it sounds like you've been through the mill there. I do suffer with insomnia, but there are times when I have to sleep and if that's interrupted then I'm not happy.
DeleteAnd don't worry about Mr Psycho. I've moved away since and pray I don't bump into him again. Thanks Ceil.
Ha! Only once. I once lived next door to pot smokers. I became used to the smell of pot even though I have never seen it before. The smoke would filter into my bathroom and take over the scent of my cranberry potpourri. I swear I sometimes got high off of what trickled in because I couldn't explain my behavior some days. I'd go into the bathroom singing and come out irritated and just pissed off. Apart from that experience, all my neighbors have been heaven-sent.
ReplyDeleteYes, the smell of cannabis often comes wafting through my windows. That high-grade stuff the kids smoke nowadays smells so STRONG! I personally don't like the smell, but a friend has even told me that there are incense-sticks that smell of the stuff. Not for me, I say. I've never tried it and never will.
DeleteI'm sorry that I didn't see this earlier. I'm even sorrier that you've had such terrible neighbors. You were right in telling off that masked man, and thank goodness you moved. I would've gone crazy not being able to sleep with all of that noise. Hope that no other inconsiderate neighbors move in.
ReplyDeleteJulie
Thanks Julie. So far so good at the moment. My most recent neighbours are really nice and keep themselves to themselves although we say hello whenever we meet. It's nice and polite.
DeleteOMGeesh! I don't think I'd be able to cope with such neighbors. I had a neighbor who snored really really loud. It kept me awake every.single.night. It was horrible. The loudest snores ever. I couldn't call the cops on someone for snoring. I had to muddle through it until my lease ended.
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the most unusual cases of nuisance-neighbours I've ever heard of!!! I've heard some snoring in my time, but never loud enough to be heard next door! That man's nostrils must look like a bomb-site!!! Thanks for the laugh Hope.
DeleteAs usual, your posts get people talking. My wife and I have six children. Thank God, all but one are grown now. Anyway, when they were young, because we had more children than anyone else in the neigbhorhood, all the neighborhood children flocked to our home. Some of the children apparently were not taught well about proper conduct. Some wanted to wear their pants half way down their butt. Some wanted to play too rough. Sometimes, I heard foul language, etc. The biggest problem for me was trying to police what was going on and to make sure I helped my children understand what conduct was acceptable and which was not.
ReplyDeleteI really didn't know many of the parents of these children. Some of them lived on adjacent streets. Also, fortunately, I live at the end of the street and my immediate neighbors on both sides of the street are good.
Seems as though you have had enough neighbor drama for the both of us.
It would be great to know that you had a positive impact on those children in the long term. Perhaps it was their only chance to experience an adult laying down firm but fair boundaries. There's research that states that even just one positive adult can make a huge difference in the development of a child. For some of those kids you may have been that influence.
DeleteYes, I had enough drama for both of us, ha ha ha ha. Always good to hear from you Frank.
Not so much with next door neighbors as suppose to landlords who lived downstairs or upstairs and they did the complaining. Basically, I had to tip toe around my apt to get from one room to another because my walking bothered them. Or, I made to much noise in the morning while getting my son ready for school and that bothered landlord son who liked to sleep in late. You know....things of that nature. Thanks RPD!!
ReplyDeleteMadison:)
The complete flip-side. The imposing landlord who forces unreasonable boundaries on you. Guess if he was anything other than your landlord you might have told him to take a walk and jump ha ha! Thanks Madison.
Deletehaha your description of the psyco neighbour is hilarious, although I'm sure it wasn't at the time! Yes, I had a family who lived above me for 2 years, they would constantly have parties with lots of domestic fights, sometimes they would be so loud it would wake me and my daughter up at various points in the night. Once when I went up to ask them to be quite at 4am I was told through the door they had a gun. The kids (7 and 11) would play the "jumping off the bed game" and basketball on the floor right above my bedroom, the noise was deafening. The elder son would throw all his trash out the window, which landed on the ground outside my bedroom window, and when he fell into the wrong crowd there were boys kicking the building door down, damaging the communal area and threatening the neighbours. As a single mother living alone with my child it was very scary sometimes. I called the landlord and told him they needed to go and they got evicted. It turns out they had caused so much damage to their flat it had to be completely re-furbished before any new tenants could move in. It's been 4 months since they moved out and I haven't heard a peep from the new family. It's so nice having good neighbours :)
ReplyDeletehttp://myfroley.blogspot.com
Wow, pretending they had a gun? There're very lucky an armed response unit didn't turn up to show them the real guns...
DeleteI just don't understand why people wish to continually damage and destroy the very area they have to live in.
So glad they got evicted and you've got some peace back but they have only moved on to cause someone else a problem.
So good to hear from you My Froley and hope you return again.
YIKES! I sounds like you almost had the makings of a horror movie. Very creepy. I remember when my husband and I lived an apartment. One night very louds noises came from the apartment below us -- glass shattering, banging, etc. We thought something really bad was going down so we called the police, asking them to please keep us anonymous. (We weren't on the best terms with this guy for other reasons.) The cops came and interviewed him, then they came up to our apartment. The guy said that nothing had happened in his apartment but he'd heard terrible noises coming out of OUR apartment that night. We were baffled. The cops just looked at us as if to say, "There is some crazy crap going on between these two people. We're outta here." Luckily, we moved away a few months later. Living so close to crazy really freaked us out.
ReplyDeleteHa, ha ha ha. This guy is funny. He backed the police off and led them straight to you. Good thing you got out of there when you had a chance because this guy might have had plans for you.... scary.
DeleteI've heard the saying 'if you see crazy coming, cross the street'... but if you live next door to 'crazy' it is harder to avoid.
Thanks for stopping by Janene.
Wow! Those are some scary people you lived next door to! Oh yes, I have a horror story of my own. I live in a cozy neighborhood where most of us have lived here a long time and are all good friends. 10 years ago, a new family moved in. The wife was odd and rather cold, but she liked me so I did my best to get along with her. The husband was a very nice fellow. All was well for a few years--although the wife was very critical of everyone on the block and most people couldn't stand her. And then one day she was very rude to one of my kids. I spoke to her about it--nothing bad, just told her that next time she needed to come to me first before berating my kid in public at a party. I thought that was the end of it but oh no! She started spreading nasty rumors about me, she put up an illegal fence ON my own property! The hubs and I tore it down and threw it back into her yard. She called the cops but they sided with us. A war ensued for a good two years--we hated one another. They clipped all our holiday lights, put weed killer on all of our flowers and bought cameras that faced our property. And it wasn't just us--they started doing these horrible things to everyone who sided with us (basically the whole block). I can't tell you how many times we called the cops on each other. The wife was a real wacko. Despite it all, I still liked the husband--he was a kind man and I could see that what she was doing was killing him. And I was right because once they moved away a few years later, the husband committed suicide. As awful as it is, I can't say I am surprised. She was the devil incarnate.
ReplyDeleteDevil incarnate? Oh my giddy aunt MM. This truly was the neighbour from hell alright. Spreading rumours is one thing but it can become extremely dangerous when someone starts to do physical things such as putting weed killer on your flowers, clipping electrical lights etc. It means they are prepared to go to any ends to make a point. She was out for blood mate. Luckily, nobody got seriously hurt. And to think her husband was stuck in the middle is very sad indeed especially if he knew his wife was in the wrong. That would also make her worse. Her husband must have been in a very dark place to commit suicide and maybe she now has regrets.
DeleteThanks for sharing your story with us Menopausal Mama, I'll be stopping by later to have a good read of your blog.
The best neighbors I ever get are the ones that keep to themselves. Maybe it's me. I want to be friendly but I want my privacy.
ReplyDeleteHave a good weekend!
Your friend,
~John M
After all the stories I've heard in the comments John, maybe it's a good thing that you want to keep your privacy, ha ha ha. Enjoy your weekend mate :)
DeleteMy Man... Great Post:
ReplyDeleteIn reading this Post, I immediately thought of a great Movie from 1990. If you have not seen it, PLEASE try to view "Pacific Heights" with Melanie Griffith & Matthew Modine. Grab a bag of popcorn and sit back and enjoy the 'Old Times.' lol
We have been lucky... a baby or some kids rough housing above us, but, all in all, not so bad. Have a great week my friend, Slu
Is that the one with Michael Keaton in it as well? If so I think I remember it and it's a really entertaining film. You've dodged the bullet with relatively good neighbours mate. Have an enjoyable week Slu.
DeleteHi Rum-Punch Drunk! I’ve sure had my share of bad neighbors. Your Mr. Psycho neighbor was very creepy and potentially dangerous. “You don’t disturb me, then I won’t disturb you,” is exactly my sentiment too.
ReplyDeleteWhen my husband and I lived in a small flat years ago, we had some unpleasant neighbors including: the 5 am opera singer (not even very good) who didn’t hear when you’d knock on the door so my husband had to loudly pound on the wall…the couple who smoked cigarettes and burned sage at the same time, the smell together was horrid and it all came across the hall into our flat. When I sprayed air freshener in the hall, they got insulted and began leaving their door wide open and burning sage right in the hallway, obnoxious people…and the young guy with the loud music and parties at all hours, leaving beer cans and trash in the hallway.
After we bought a house, we had a neighbor who liked to mow his lawn and use power tools at midnight…a mechanic neighbor who’d park cars on his front lawn and work on them at all hours, revving engines and blasting music…a neighbor who'd let his pit bull run loose up and down the street (had to call on that one, too dangerous for us and our dogs)...a neighbor who let her children trample my garden and crush my flowers because she didn’t believe in discipline. Thankfully, those neighbors are gone now.
Yes, I do report bad behavior but I like trying to talk to the neighbor first. Has a neighbor ever complained about me? Yes, happened when I was single, in my 20s. I put a Peace sign poster on my door. Just a peace symbol. My landlord didn’t mind. But neighbors in that small New Jersey town did mind and called the police. Yes, the police, for a peace sign!! Poor neighbors were afraid a bunch of hippies were living there LOL! It was just my sister and me and we had no wild parties, didn’t bother anyone. A policeman came to the door and told me to take down the poster. I politely declined saying it was my constitutional right to put what I wanted on my door (I was a young idealist!). He said, that may be so but it bothers the neighbors. I said, well, maybe my neighbor’s curtains on her door bother me but I’m not about to ask her to down them down. So you see how the conversation went. He kept coming back for 2 weeks trying to convince me but I never took that sign down until I moved. True story.
Meant to say toward the end: I’m not about to ask her to take them down.
DeleteWell done for sticking to your guns about the peace sign JerseyLil. It sounds to me like those neighbours can't have had any real drama in their lives to get worked up about such a tiny thing or maybe they thought you and your sister would change the whole neighbourhood into pot smoking hippies. Maybe you should have demanded her to take down those curtains too. And the cop must have been lacking in vital work to spend 2 weeks working that 'case' ha ha ha.
DeleteI had roaches by the dozen in my first apartment. Does that count?
ReplyDeleteOh yes, they count too. Roaches can drive you absolutely mad because if you see one then you know there is an army behind the cupboards waiting to crawl all over the place as soon as you switch the lights off. Yuk.
DeleteHey RPD, this is a nice subject, a book can be easily written... just one story:
ReplyDeleteI leave in a place with a very narrow road to enter and my neighbor is always parking .... where? in front of my gate of course... so that I have to enter from a small corner with 1 cm on the right side, and 1 cm on the left side...
Well well.... I can tell you that every time I enter to my gate, I send him my "big thanks and ""nice wishes""" for his life... so, can you imagine ???
I'd call that heaping coals of fire on his head Massimo, making him feel uncomfortable because you're sending him good greetings, ha ha ha. You should invite him round for a coffee and maybe he'll decide to stop parking in front of your gate.
DeleteThanks for the comment mate and seasonal greetings to you :)
Hey RPD..
ReplyDeleteNeighbors!! Oh, I never had that good experience with them! The last neighbors we had they bribed a sweeper and killed a stray dog whom my mom used to feed some bits of food! I think that's damn inhuman one can become.
But here, where I live currently, neighbors are fine. At least not that irritating as the previous ones.Infact they are kind of helpful.
Nice post! :)
Poor dog. I really don't like people who are abusive to animals in any way, it's a reflection of their inner character. So glad you're got some nice people around you now.
DeleteThanks for stopping by Esabella.
Great post topic! And yes, I have experienced this same kind of thing. At one time I had spouse abuse going on with a couple who lived next door to me. In fact, it got so bad that I reported them to management. And when that didn't work, I had to call the police.
ReplyDeleteI've also had noisy party animal neighbors at one time living next door, who would start their partying at about 1 AM and would go on until 4 AM. Yup...I had to eventually call the police on them too.
Ignorance comes to mind Ron. These people just don't seem to understand that other people live next door.
DeleteI would have called the police too.
Thanks for the comment Ron.
I can honestly say that we have been lucky enough over the past 15 years to have had very good neighbors living in the apartments near us. Other than an occassional dog barking or some nasty smelling food they were cooking we have no complaints. NYC is a bit different in that even though we might live next to someone for a long time we never really know who our neighbors are.
ReplyDeleteYou're blessed mate. You've dodged the bullet for true. I hope you have another 15 years of peace and quiet too. Seasonal greetings Phil.
DeleteMany times, so many times. Naughty of me, but I tend to refer to them by other not-so-nice names: Mr and Mrs Ogre and Jr., the Ma and Pa Kettles, the VIPs, the Noseys, etc.
ReplyDeleteThat's funny Donna. But seriously, humour can be a good way of dealing with the stress!
DeleteSorry for the late response.